A friend said this song describes me to a T'
I think so too...
Lover I Don't Have To Love
Artist:Bright Eyes

I picked you out of a crowd and talked to you
I said I liked your shoes
You said, "Thanks, can I follow you?"
So it's up the stairs and out of view
No prying eyes
I poured some wine
I asked your name, you asked the time

Now it's two o'clock
The club is closed
We're up the block
Your hands on me; Pressing hard against your jeans
Your tongue in my mouth, trying to keep the words from coming out
You didn't care to know who else may have been you before

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck
Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I thought he said to meet him here but I'm not sure
I've got the money if you've got the time
You said it feels good
I said, "I'll give it a try."

Then my mind went dark
We both forgot where your car was parked
Let's just take the train
I'll meet up with the band in the morning

Bad actors with bad habits
Some sad singers they just play tragic
And the phone's ringing and the van's leaving
Let's just keep touching; let's just keep... keep singing...

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk
Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I've got a hunger and I can't seem to get full
I need some meaning I can memorize
The kind I have always seems to slip my mind

But you, but you...

You write such pretty words
But life's no storybook
Love's an excuse to get hurt
And to hurt.
Do you like to hurt?
I do, I do

Then hurt me... [x10]

"Everything must go" by Taking Back Sunday <3

Facing up to my life stick your neck out/ drive fast/ take chances. Take a fucking chance.

This album IS EPIC. I wake up just to sleep for three more hours, it might be that I'm actually tired, but the truth is that I feel tired from sleeping so much. The recumbent state has become an escape. On the Agenda for today is to go out and enjoy the weather while it's still partially nice.

"Feed me fear informal gluttony"

Why do I keep making these same mistakes? I know what eventually ends up happening...
I thought I learned from this yet despite the struggle to get myself back together I still choose fleeting happiness over friends... I feel as if at least half of the friends I've lost have a right to impale me on a sharp object. Why do i do this? As if I'm unable to juggle various relationships and only concentrate myself on the one i deem most "important." I feel stupid and childish. And then I realize that some of those so called friends just gave up on me when they found happiness. Bottle this happiness someone... maybe we can all overdose on it someday. So today I end my bitterness and hopefully i can start over, if theres anything thats great about life... starting over has to be somewhere at the top of the list.

-a human,
Erik.

So I'm seeing this suciaa now haha. pretty lame I know... even lamer is her silver ring ohhh god no!! lmao it's cool though I guess. ANND yeah she kinda went out without telling her rents so I got her grounded hahha. She so knows it was worth it ... or she better. xD She missed out on Halloween but I  don't feel bad... not because I'm a jerk, which I am, but because she's the one that left without saying anything and I didn't make her do that.

It was a great day.
and thats probably the last time I'll see her
I sent her off with her first rose...

strung out on confusion. Wheres my shiny new glock?? im ever so boredd. and i need  want her warmth. The truth is I hate this part, you know... the back and forth game. "Lets see who needs who most." it's utter bullshit honestly. Plus the tension is just well actually thats a bonus the explosion at thee end, unless you're on the losing team and you end up with an Anticlimactic ending. I'm pretty sure this is all very much confusing but thats just the way it is. Noone ever handed us a guidebook on how to be human...I honestly believe it would outsell the bible.

Halloween owns my life! xxxD

ERIK IS EAGERLY FLEEING THE SCENE OOOHHHHH baby!!